
I’m not here to help you find a competitive advantage.
I’m here to help you become one.

If websites could talk…
Your website: Hey! Remember me? You used to love me. What happened? I miss what we had together.
You: Oh website, I hate to say that you’re starting to embarrass me more than my own parents. You just sound so dull these days. And, I could swear I’m not dull. I just don’t have the time… or the energy… or the inclination… to figure out how to make you sound interesting.
Your website: Don’t worry! I’ve got the answer. There’s this place called PepperJar…

Why settle for boring when you could have brilliant?

Maybe you haven’t had the time to give your website words some TLC in a while (ever?) and they sound like they just stepped out of 1993.

Maybe you’ve stalked your competitors’ sites so much you’re worried there’s a warrant out for your arrest. And you still have no idea how to make yourself sound better than them… Or maybe you just have a stronger urge to stick your face in a cheesecake than work on your copy. (If it’s chocolate flavour, then that’s totally understandable.)
Here’s the thing. The words you use on your website are the difference between a prospective client clicking the buy button… or the snooze button. (Which, let’s face it, happens way more often than it should at the moment.) And you clicking the refresh button on your Paypal account like a caffeine-starved lunatic doesn’t make sales happen any quicker.
So, what if you could have a website bursting with woo-worthy words, that make people’s eyes pop, jaws drop, and hearts stop, because you’re offering exactly what they need?
I’m going to guess you’d do a happy dance. (Clothes are optional.) Time to turn up the music, amigo, because here’s how you can work with me to make that happy dance happen.

P-p-p-p-p-pick up a package.

Text On Fire.
Website copy so hot you’ll want to hire yourself.

WHAT YOU GET
One whip-smart and super sharp homepage that magnetizes eyeballs from the get-go. POW. This will hook attention – and then keep it.
One emotionally-charged and personality-laced about page that turns your story into a where-have-you-been-all-my-life connection between you and them.
One work with me page (with up to three package descriptions) or short form sales page that will have prospects swooning at the screen and ready to put their money in your pants bank account.
A one-sentence introduction that perfectly encapsulates who you are and who you help and leaves people wanting to know more more more. (Ideal for using in elevators.) (Or not.)
A tasty selection of taglines that give your business, product, or service the wow-factor in a snappy sentence.
Irresistible opt-in copy for your lead magnet so you can collect email addresses, cultivate a community, and convert sales like crazy.
HOW WE (ROCK AND) ROLL
We agree a kick-off date. You fill out my fun and fancypants brand questionnaire that digs to the diamonds. Then we have a 1 hour Skype call to dig even more. (Don’t worry, shovel not required.) You get four deliverables in total – a ‘sound check’, first draft, second draft, and final draft – which means you have three opportunities to provide feedback. And that means you end up with copy that rocks your little cotton socks off.
Projects typically take three weeks from kick-off to completion – so long as you do your homework on time!
YOUR INVESTMENT
£1997 (about $2775) paid in two installments. Now booking for APRIL 2018.
Want to know if this is right for your business? Let’s go on a (Skype) date.
You + me. 20 minutes. Free.
Need something else?

How about a song to explain.

This one’s written to the tune of the South of Music classic ‘My Favourite Things’. (Please sing when out of earshot of colleagues, spouses, cats, etc.)
Brand names with presence and taglines with power
Product descriptions served up to devour
Messaging oozing more punch than the ring
These are a few of my favourite things
Web copy grabbing the eyeballs of browsers
Sales pages opening wallets like flowers
Fun email sequences dripping with zing
These are a few of my favourite things
Adverts and blog posts and crackerjack bios
In-app experience and sharp scripts for videos
Writing words so you can hear that ker-ching
These are a few of my favourite things
(Now for the high bit.)
When your brain’s stuck
When your words suck
When you need a hand
Let me help you out with some linguistic clout
And then you won’t feel so bad!

Get the picture?

Then get the pepper.

AKA book a free 15 minute call to talk about how we can make your words delight eyeballs everywhere.